Stay At Home Mom’s Guide To Sanity
So, you’re a stay at home mom? Me too.
However you got here, whether by losing your job, taking a temporary leave or by your own desire, here we are. I chose to be a stay at home mom and have been struggling to keep what teeny ounces of sanity I have left for the last decade. Yep, a decade! I have had the odd online job, tried selling everything under the sun, and even went back to school during this time, and am now the proud owner of this blog as well as dabbling in other entrepreneur activities (Printable shop launching soon!.
Though it has helped some, I still needed to find ways to keep myself from throwing myself in the looney bin. I know as a fellow stay at home mom you feel me. When you’re taking care of your child/children all day every day, or part of the day if your child/children attend school. We must learn to survive through every early morning, late night, temper tantrum, and natural disaster equivalent mess (oh, and now pandemics?!) Sometimes you just need to lock yourself in the bathroom and take a breather. So, I’ve decided to share a few of the (better) ways I’ve discovered how to handle the everyday stresses of motherhood.
How To Stay Sane As A Stay At Home Mom
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Find “me” time.
It probably sounds like a total “DUH” but trust me, you need to take it seriously. Creating time just for yourself is imperative to keeping hold of your sanity. If you don’t get enough time alone you’ll become a slave to the world of the short people. As a stay at home mom, this is all too easy.
They can control you, consume you, and turn you into a crazed zombie. Don’t let it happen! No matter when or how you have to do it, take control of your life, and give yourself some time to relax and find a peaceful moment. It could be taking a hot bath after the little ones have gone to sleep, it could be browsing Pinterest while the kids are zoned out in front of the t.v, or leaving them with dad while you run a quick errand alone.
Or heck, sit outside by yourself with a cup of tea and just listen to the birds sing, the wind blow and take a deep breath. Each day, whether it be for 3 minutes or an hour, make sure you get your “me time”. Mine is at 12 am, but I hope you find yours at a much less late hour.
Take a walk with your kid/s
This is something I try to do with my son on a regular basis, not so much in the dead of winter, but on the nice weather days, he and I go for 15-30 minute walks outside, just around the house. I found that this is good for so many reasons.
Not only does it give you a bit of exercise and some fresh air, but it helps you to suddenly zap out of whatever funk you’ve been in all day; yelling, cleaning, cooking, teaching, emails, phone calls, etc, it all adds up and taking a break to go outside and take a walk with your little one/s is so revitalizing. It gives you energy, relaxes you and it also gives you the perfect chance to spend quality time with your child and talk to them.
Ask them questions about their day, about school, their interests, their friends, their thoughts on things going on at home, and just have a real conversation. It’s good for them and good for you. They need to express their thoughts, learn conversation skills, and spend time with you. You will feel a million times better, so when you’re feeling too stressed, just grab the kiddos and step outside and take a walk. Observe nature, the outside world, and talk to them about life.
Prep & Plan.
It may sound time-consuming but actually, it saves you time overall. Taking the time to do beforehand preparation for your daily activities, meals, etc are worth it, and also schedule out things that you need to squeeze in like homework to be done, people to get back to, shopping trips, places the kiddos need to go, things you need to remember to do around the house, set a certain time aside to get these things done.
Write them down and don’t forget. Planning ahead and making the necessary preparations ahead of time make all the difference. I promise you. It saves you time, energy, and most importantly, sanity. You can find simple to follow instructions for meal prep online and you can even pick up some make-ahead food containers to make it even easier.
Getting a detailed planner is an easy and fun way to write down all your “to-do’s” and schedules. You can add planner stickers, colored pens, and washi tapes to add fun and customizable detail to your planner. I highly recommend investing in something like a daily planner, a nice one with larger squares to write in, and room for all the fun customization. Taking the time to use a day planner will help keep you organized and sane!
You probably already shop online at least occasionally but don’t forget there is an entire world of products you can find in a gazillion places on the internet. No traffic, long lines, in-store temper tantrums, or real pants required. If you’re having a crazy day but need to shop and it’s something you don’t need right away, avoid all the time on the road and the stress of dragging resistant little ones all over creation and just hop online. (You might even find better deals!)
Rediscover your favorite game or movie to share with the kids.
It’s fun to have game and movie nights with the fam bam and sharing something special from your childhood with them not only gives you the warm and fuzzies, but it introduces them to something they’ve probably never seen before and gives you something to bond over.
So dig out your old dusty favorite board game from when you were a kid or put in that classic Disney movie and cuddle up with them as you enjoy something that warms your heart and go create some new memories together. Even if they’re not that into it, at least you know you will enjoy it and have a good time in nostalgia land.
Good old fashioned stress relief.
There’s nothing wrong with taking in some good old-fashioned stress relief. Some great ideas are to make some chamomile or lavender tea, get friendly with a heat wrap on aching muscles, ask a friend/significant other for a massage, watch your favorite tv show before bed, or read a few chapters of a good book, do a low-key workout or take a bubble bath.
Find something relaxing to unwind before the end of the day, do some stretches and deep breathing, tie it in with your “me time”. Oh, and don’t forget about that chocolate I know you have hidden somewhere, the time to break it out is now. 😉
Connect with other SAHMS
It’s easy to let a social life disappear when you’re a stay at home mom, and staying connected to other adults is important, right? My advice is to connect with some other stay at home moms for relatable social networking. You might meet some new friends, swap stories, advice, recipes, and more!
It might sound silly, but Facebook groups are awesome for this, go look up some SAHM groups now! Also, the Momiego app is an awesome place to connect with other mamas as well! Check it out, it’s free to download and connects to your Facebook!
Have you ever considered talking to a therapist? I know, doesn’t seem to fit in here but actually…it does. Personally, I have never felt comfortable talking to someone about myself even though I did try for about 6 months with a super great therapist.
It wasn’t my jam but I know lots of people are helped by having some time with a therapist. Maybe talking with someone will help you come to terms with a stay at home mom life and feel more confident in raising your littles on your own. If this interests you, please check out BetterHelp.com
I hope I’ve helped and given you hope. You can save your sanity after all!
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I got your back, you’re never alone.
Love, Jess XO