How To Overcome Single Mom Guilt

how to overcome single mom guilt | neveralonemom.com

Hey hey there mamas!
It’s me again, your girl Jess and I have come with some solace for that heavy guilt we all deal with daily as stressed-out single moms and how to overcome.

single mom guilt | neveralonemom.com

Being a single mom is tough, tougher than most of us like to admit, and it comes with guilt over things like the feeling we are not enough for our children, or we can’t provide enough for them on our own. Then there are other things as well that cross our minds as we try to sleep at night. But don’t worry momma, I am here to help you…and me to overcome that guilt because it’s not necessary.

When someone says to you “I’m sorry” or makes you feel shame for being a single mom, just take it stride. Many people out there still throw judgment, and criticism towards us for raising our babies on our own.  Don’t let their ignorance or lack of understanding make you feel like you’re doing something wrong or bad. You are so strong, brave and doing what is best. You are doing your job as a mom and you know what? You’re a superhero! Don’t let anyone take that truth away from you.

No matter what, your kids will hate you or disagree on how you chose to raise them. It’s normal. It’s harsh but totally true. At some point, your kid/s will hate you. Or at least, say they do. So when your bratty toddler or teenager is making you feel like scum but saying or doing hurtful things and you feel tempted to believe that you are a bad mom and that doing this alone is just not working…it’s OK. This happens to every mom every day. It’s not you, typically it’s them and they will get over it and someday thank you and appreciate all your hard efforts. So go get a massage from a hot shirtless masseuse and remember that this is a normal part of parenting. Don’t let their snotty little attitudes bring ya down.

You can only do the best you can and that is always good enough. To further drive this point home, you really can only do so much and that is always enough for your kiddo/s. Whether it seems that way or not, it really is.  As long as everyone is provided for, happy and loved, then that’s what’s most important. You can do that, so don’t worry. They’ll be fine. 🙂

Find your strength as a single mom and let it empower you! You can do it and you will. Ready to wear your super mom cape yet?

Have hope that it will all turn out to be alright. Just trust yourself. You were made to be a mother and your instincts and heart will guide you.  Take it one day at a time if you have to, believe me, I do!  Focus on getting through today and let tomorrow worry for itself. No need to stress over things that haven’t happened yet!

Don’t blame yourself or feel any guilt over being a single parent. Most of us did not choose it, and if you did then hey, more power to ya mama! You got this girl, No worries! 😉

single mom | neveralonemom.com

Keep your chin up beautiful!

Love Jess XO

The Sunshine Blogger Award!

Sunshine Blogger Award | neveralonemom.com

Hey hey mamas!

I’m so excited and honored to be a winner of the amazing Sunshine Blogger Award!
The Sunshine Blogger Award is given to bloggers by other bloggers who are creative, positive, and inspiring.

Sunshine Blogger Award | neveralonemom.com

All winners of the award must answers questions given to them by the blogger who nominated them, so here are my answers Gemma!

  1. What made you choose your topic in blogging? As a single mom, I find support a very difficult and almost non-existent thing. So I wanted to write about things other single moms could relate to as well as offering advice, tips and support directly from my own experiences.
    2. What motto do you live by? I don’t have one.
    3. What is the biggest challenge you had to overcome while starting your blog? Making the time for it. Being a single mom who homeschools and manages an online business finding the time to write content has been really hard, but now that I have no clients in my VA biz, I am finding more time to write which has been great.
    4. If you had the opportunity to interview anyone you like and feature them who would it be? Johnny Depp. Because he’s a true artist. He has so much creativity and passion and he’s such an incredible man. I’d love to just listen to him talk, tell stories and answer questions.
    5. Who is your favorite blogger? I don’t guess I have one because I don’t follow any haha.
    6. If given the opportunity to mentor a new blogger, what single piece of advice would you give them? Be uniquely yourself. Don’t try to copy anyone else, or be fake. Just be you and if people follow then they will follow.
    7. What is something interesting that most people don’t know about you? I am an obsessive T.V watcher! Every evening and into the wee hours of the morning I am in front of my T.V with snacks and tea, either watching the latest episode of my newest show obsession or binging an oldie but goodie that I’ve watched a million times before.  I love my shows!
    8. You have a chance to replay your childhood game/video game. What would it be? I never really played games growing up, I wasn’t that kind of kid. But if I have to pick something, I guess I’d say Pogs. Who remembers those!?
    9. Name a blogger you would love to collaborate with. I don’t know any 🙁
    10. What would you like to achieve by end of 2017? Successfully earning an income. Try as I might, money just doesn’t grow on any of my trees. Also, I have a goal of finishing the first draft of the personal novel I have been writing for the last 3 years.
    11. What would you like to tell your readers? That even though times may be tough, and you may feel alone in your journey that you are never alone. I am here to be your friend and I hope you subscribe to my blog so we can stay connected!

Again a huge thank you to Gemma Horlock for my nomination! You should check out Gemma’s blog here!

If you are a blogger and you’d like to be nominated by me to receive The Sunshine Blogger Award then subscribe to my blog by putting in your email in the little subscribe box up at the top of this page! (or if you’re on mobile just leave a comment and include your blog URL 😉 ) All the details and instructions, if you are chosen, will be emailed to you! The 11 nominees will be chosen on June 5th!

Bloggers unite! Thank you and love to all you mommas!
Jess XO

The Perfect Mother’s Day Gift

Mother's Day | neveralonemom.com

Hey mamas,

So Mother’s Day is just around the corner, and if you haven’t picked out the perfect gift for your mom yet then I have something you may be very interested in! My friends over at StoryWorth have a special Mother’s Day sale going on! So I thought I would tell you about something they offer that makes the absolute perfect Mother’s Day gift.

If you’ve never heard of StoryWorth they have a really neat gift idea that helps you learn more about your mom! So, you probably never knew about your Mom’s first crush, the time she fought City Hall to save the library, or her brief stint in the marching band. StoryWorth makes it easy and fun for her to share stories with loved ones every week. At the end of the year, she’ll get them all bound in a beautiful hardcover book. (You can start right away, which means this is a great last-minute gift too.) Strengthen your bond as you get to know her in a whole new way! Doesn’t that sound perfect? 

 

Here’s how it works:

  1. Each week, we send her questions you’ve never thought to ask.
  2. She writes a story each week, which is shared with you. (She can also record it.)
  3. A year’s worth of stories are bound into a beautiful keepsake book.

Don’t miss out on helping your mom create something she is sure to love and cherish for years to come using StoryWorth. Hey, you can even do this for yourself! You deserve a totally awesome gift too! Go check it out and snag $20 off your order! Click here to head on over.  I just totally saved your Mother’s Day. You’re welcome, you know I’ve always got your back. 😉

I hope all you fabulous mamas have a wonderful Mother’s Day!

Love, Jess XO

 

10 Things To Never Say To A Single Mom

Hey there sexy mamas!
So, I’ve been wanting to write this post for a while becasue I’ve had it up to wazoo with dealing with the dumb things people can say. I’m sure all these things have been said to you and as a single mom doesn’t it just make you want to strangle the person? Ok…maybe that’s just me…I tend to have a violent imagination haha…so I have made a list of 10 things to never say to a single mom. Let’s get into this.
  1. Get a sitter.

Yeah, I’m just going to leave my kid with some random stranger or dump them on a friend or relative so I can go hang out with you. Sure. Oh, and I’ll be pulling money out from my arse to pay them as well. Sounds terrific. See you at 8. Do people actually expect a single mother to just have someone available at all times to watch their kid so they can just take off whenever? Look, I am taking care of my child/ren ALONE. I cannot and will not be going out with you tonight. Don’t be dumb.
2.Where’s the dad? What happened?

This question makes me want to show them my inner ghetto attitude with a very nasty “that aint none ya business!” But instead I just answer them leaving out all the horrific and angering details even though it isn’t any of their business. My kid’s dad is in Acapulco working as a spy for the Government protecting us from the aliens if you must know, becasue why else would he not be in his kids life?
3. Doesn’t the dad help? Does he get them?

Why do people even ask this? When they look at a single mom what makes them think to ask if the dad helps out or sees them sometimes? Not all separated families co-parent. Most actually don’t. So don’t be nosy.
4. Do they have different dads?

If you have more then one child I’m sure you’ve been asked this. It’s frustrating isn’t it? I can’t believe people actually ask this. Just don’t.
5. No statistics.

People love quoting statistics to us. Like as if they think telling us facts which are mostly wrong will make us change our entire lives for the better. Seriously? If you are not a single parent, then don’t you dare quote statistics to me and think you’re being helpful. You’re not.

single mom | neveralonemom.com
6. You single moms.

Never ever start off a conversion by saying “you single moms” umm…excuse me? Us single moms? Watch it sweetie. It’s just like saying all you hat wearers. Really?
7.I feel like a single mom too.

Ok, let’s get something straight. If you are married, are in a relationship or something to that effect then no, you cannot say that you relate to being a single mom in any way. Women are always saying, my husband works all the time, or he travels a lot or my boyfriend doesn’t help with my kids so I feel like a single mom too. You’re kidding me right? No honey, you have no clue what being a real single mom is like. So appreciate the man you have in your life and shut your mouth.
8. How do you do it alone?

How do you ask? Really now. Umm well, the same way any other mom on the planet does it. By loving my child/ren with all my heart and doing my best for them. I am perfectly capable and you should believe that I am too. I just simply do it. There isn’t a how. There is no single mom manual. Love is all you need.
9. Poor kid, he/she doesn’t have a dad.

I’m sorry? Did I hear you correctly? My poor kid? That’s hilarious. There is nothing poor or sad about my kid not having a dad. My son is lucky and better off to not have his dad in the picture. As long as a child is loved, then no. They are not poor and they are not missing out on anything.
10. I’m sorry.

When someone tells me they are sorry that I’m a single mom I seriously don’t understand. You’re sorry for….what? Please explain why it’s so awful that I have beautiful kids that I get to take care of and love. I don’t know what it is you feel so sorry for but, I don’t accept your apology. I would however, love to accept a coffee.

I hope this has opened your eyes a bit and taught you how to respond to these ridiculous questions or what not to say to any single mom you come across. We are in this together.  On your own, but never alone. 😉

Love your girl, Jess XO

Mom Self Care Toolkit -Freebie!-

Self Care For Moms | neveralonemom.com

Hey mommas!

I have something very special to share with you, and I know you are going to love it! I am very excited to share this mom self-care toolkit with you that a friend of mine has put together. Read on to hear her story and to get this awesome toolkit for yourself! (It’s free!) 😀

Six years ago, my friend Jen Riday was struggling with her at-the-time 5 kids.

She had just suffered a miscarriage.

And she baaarely liked her husband.

She hit rock bottom and started to feel like there was no purpose to her life. She had given everything to her family… baking bread, throwing elaborate birthday parties, trying to be the “perfect” mom.

But she kind of lost herself in the process.

Today, she is feeling great and happier than ever (and she now has 6 kids!). She has become a Women’s Happiness Expert so she can help other moms find their way out from those low points we sometimes fall into.

So the big question is — how did she make such a huge shift in just 6 years?

Well, Jen has created a free digital toolkit that compiles all of her best tips on exactly what she did.

And guess what? She’s letting me hook you up with that toolkit — for free! (Yasss) 😀

 

Sign up to get free access to the toolkit here.

So what IS this toolkit, exactly?

It’s the Self Care Toolkit for Busy Moms.

It includes a video training, a workbook, the “Wheel of Happiness” (if you like wheels and you like happiness, you’ll love this! Seriously, though, the WoH is amazing!), and 2 guided meditations Jen created just for moms like you.

The toolkit is packed with some of Jen’s best teachings.

The thing I love about Jen is that she has a fun teaching style where she’s able to break down complex ideas into simple, easy-to-follow steps. (Her thousands of students would probably agree!)

And the best part about this training? It’s all online– so you can get crackalackin’ right now on learning how to take time for yourself (without guilt and without any hassle).

All you have to do is sign up for the series here (there’s no charge).

I hope you’re going to snag up this awesome freebie! I also hope that it brings you joy and some much-needed support!

Lastly, if you are interested in hearing Jen talk about her mom toolkit then you can listen to her right here on her podcast!

I’m so excited about this! Be sure to grab your toolkit now!

Enjoy!

Much Love,

Jess XO

Shows On Netflix For The Single Mom

Shows On Netflix for single moms | neveralonemom.com

Hey mama’s!
How’s it hanging? I know life can be pretty stressful with youngin’s running around and being super mom and all. So I have put together a little list of some shows on Netflix for us single moms that are most def binge-worthy on those nights if and when you finally get a little time to yourself. These shows will rejuvenate you, inspire you and if nothing else, make you laugh, cry or even cringe.

So get ready to grab your remote and tune into some awesome shows that will help relieve some of that super mom stress I know you’ve got! Here we go…

Netflix shows for single moms | neveralonemom.com

One Day At A Time
This new Netflix original showcases the life of a single mom and her struggles with a twist of humor and a dash of chaos. It’s sure to make you laugh and thank the good Lord you are not her. Add this show now!

Weeds
This one is a bit older and it’s still one of the best when it comes to showing a powerful single mom making her way through this crazy world. She herself may be a bit nuts, but…aren’t we all!?

Bates Motel
This one is for the brave few of us that want a little cringe and shock factor in our shows. Based off of the original story, this show has quickly become as much of a classic as the movies that made the Bates famous. If you’re in for a gruesome tale of mother and son, this one is a must watch!

Reba
Another oldie but goodie, Reba, naturally starring Reba McEntire, is a comedic sitcom all about single mom life in Texas. It’s sure to bring on the laughter and drag out your “ya’ll”.

Mom
This hilarious comedy about a single mom played wonderfully by Anna Farris and her relationship with her own mother is one to definitely bring out the heart and gold of the life of moms. Be sure to binge this one tonight!

Gilmore Girls
What would a list of t.v shows be without Gilmore Girls? I’d hate to even think….this show is a personal favorite of mine and I think of like everyone else on the planet…am I right? Now matter how many times you watch this amazing show about mother and daughter you immediately want to start over and watch it all again. So whatever ails you in life, stressing over kids, work, breakups, being broke, fight with a friend, you know that the girls of Stars Hollow will be there for you and help straighten your crown and keep you sane. This show always deserves another binge watch, so why not do it now?

So now that you have your list of the next shows you will be watching on Netflix, what are you still doing here? Go have some much needed you time!
Love to all you mamas!
Your Girl, Jess XO

Guide To Single Mom Style.

Does Your Style Need A Bit Of A Boost?

As a busy and more likely than not broke single mom, it’s so hard to find stylish, easy and affordable wardrobe options. The lack of time, hectic mornings, and money for shopping is keeping you from always looking your best. Well not anymore! I’m here to save the day and help a sister out by giving you your guide to single mom style.

These tips and ideas will help turn you from drab to fab with little effort and little money spent. So ditch those yoga pants, it’s time for a new look!

Jeggings: So you’ve probably heard of jeggings, you may even own a pair. But have you really recognized their amazing  worth?  If you don’t know, jeggings are like a cross between leggings and  cute skinny jeans. They are slightly tighter than regular skinny jeans, but with pockets and the look of denim or cotton but with lots of stretch! These crossover pants are perfect for everyday mom life, they look great, feel super comfortable, can go with just about any top and look like real pants! Also, depending on where you shop, most jeggings are pretty affordable! Check out this stylish pair! http://amzn.to/2f99gNO

Open Cardigans:  I am obsessed with those long flowy open cardigans! Like for realz guys.  I have one in almost every color and thickness. Because when it’s a bit chilly or you just need something to throw over your outfit and run out the door it is the perfect option. You can throw these cardigans on over a t-shirt and magically look pulled together. It keeps you warm when it’s chilly out, adds a bit of style to an otherwise boring outfit and is super quick and easy to grab from the closet and just go! Every single mom needs like 20 of these in her closet, trust me. They are a must for so many reasons! I really like this one here: http://amzn.to/2f9oN06

Cowl Scarf: Do you like scarves? I love them! In pretty much every season they can make your outfit look together, cozy and so stylish. My favorites are cowl scarves because they don’t get in the way, or frustrate you with figuring out how to wrap the silly thing around yourself. You just throw it over your head and done! I think of it as sort of like a giant necklace. 😉 You can wear thin ones for spring and fall, and thick cozy ones for winter! They are easy to make if you knit or crochet, or know someone who does and easy to find at affordable prices! Complete your look by adding one and be surprised how together and chic you look! Here’s one so you can see for yourself! This one even has a coupon code so you can save those dollars! http://amzn.to/2g51toG

Headwraps/Bands: Whenever I put my hair up, I always add a wrap or headband for that extra pop of style. (And to tame the flyaways 😉 ) No time to wash your hair or style before you head out the door? Just pull your tresses back and slide on a headwrap and you’ll look great! Even if your hair is short, it will be a quick way to keep you looking fantamazing! ( Yes, I made that word up…) I found this one and fell in love! http://amzn.to/2g3Zn4R

Now for some helpful tips!

Always add jewelry. Wearing jewelry is a simple way to look like you actually put some effort into your outfit and keeps you stylish and shows your personality. Even just sticking in earrings before going out makes a big improvement to your look.

Makeup! What girl doesn’t love makeup! Making time to even just put on the basics in the morning will make you feel better and look more awake and totally together when you’re feeling not so together. A little mascara to open up your tired eyes, some sparkle to your eyelids, color on your cheeks, and kissproof lips instantly transforms you into a more confident you!

My last tip is to never forget your own style and personality. Being a busy and stressed single momma takes its toll and it’s so easy to lose yourself when you work so hard to run a household and raise children on your own. It’s important to remember to make time for yourself and always put your best foot and face forward! Looking your best will make you feel your best which ultimately makes you a better mom! So don’t forget to put on some nice clothes, fun jewelry, and some war paint! You deserve to girl, so show the world how beautiful, strong and fabulous you are! For more fashion, style and lifestyle I know you will love please check out my friend Meileilan’s blog! She’s an insanely awesome fashionista so go give her blog a read and a follow! Tell her Jess sent ya!

http://meileilan.com/home/

I hope my guide to single mom style has motivated and inspired you and that you have found some new wardrobe essentials! Love to you mamas, stay fabulous!

-JessXO